Blog Category: Emotions

The holidays are a time for family, friends, and loved ones. But for some, the holidays can be a time of sadness and grief. Whether you are grieving the loss of a loved one or struggling with infertility, the holiday season can be a difficult time. I know the pain of loss during this season, and it can be extremely difficult, especially when it seems everyone around you is happy. Here are the five stages of grief during the holidays and how to cope with them.

1. Denial: This is the stage where you try to pretend that everything is normal. You may put on a brave face and act like everything is fine, even though inside you are dying.   Many times, you fill your life with busy activities so you don't have to think about your loss. This is not sustainable and will only make you feel worse in the long run. It is important to allow yourself to feel your emotions and grieve in your own way.  Find a safe person and place and express your feelings.  

2. Anger: This is the stage where you may lash out at those around you. You may be angry at God, the world, or yourself. It is important to express your anger in a healthy way, such as through journaling, talking to a therapist or another safe person, or prayer. Don't bottle up your emotions; they will only come out in negative ways.  Make sure your family knows you love them and talk about the anger you feel.  Purification is an oil that helps me let go of anger.  I apply it on my liver.

3. Bargaining: This is the stage where you try to make deals with God or the universe. You may find yourself praying or making promises in an attempt to change the situation. Unfortunately, this stage will not change anything; it is only an attempt to delay the inevitable.  Realize there are some things you can change, and there are some things you cannot change no matter what you do.  

4. Depression: This is the stage where you may feel hopeless and helpless. You may withdraw from friends and family and isolate yourself. You will not feel like doing anything at all, so support is crucial.   It is crucial to reach out for help during this stage; talking to a therapist or clergy member,  or joining a support group can be very beneficial.    Yoga is also restorative.  (I love Yoga with Adriene!).  And essential oils are known for their uplifting qualities.  Some of my favorites are Joy, Orange, and Peace & Calming.  If you are really low and need to talk with the suicide hotline, that number is 988.  They will listen, provide support, and connect you with resources in your local area if needed.

5. Acceptance: This is the final stage of grief where you accept the situation for what it is. You may still feel sad and have days where you struggle, but overall you have made peace with what has happened. This is when healing can begin.   Acceptance doesn't mean you still don't have emotional pain, but you are better able to deal with it.  Acceptance is an essential oil that helps me reset negative emotional thought patterns.

The holiday season can be a difficult time for those who are grieving loss or struggling with infertility. If you find yourself in one of these situations, know that you are not alone and that there are others who understand what you are going through. Allow yourself to grieve in whatever way feels right for you, and reach out for help if you need it.

Inflammation is one of those words that can cause a lot of fear and confusion. We hear it all the time, but what does it actually mean? Simply put, inflammation is your body’s natural response to injury or infection. We all have inflammation to some degree or another.  It can be both beneficial and harmful, depending on how it is managed. In this blog post, we will talk about how to reduce inflammation in the body with holistic tips and techniques. 

There are a variety of factors that can lead to inflammation in the body. The most common causes include stress, poor diet, lack of exercise, smoking, alcohol consumption, medications, and exposure to environmental toxins like air pollution. All of these things can lead to an increase in inflammation levels in the body which can cause a variety of health issues including joint pain, headaches, fatigue, digestive problems and more.  

 

Fortunately there are many different ways that you can reduce inflammation naturally. Here are some holistic tips for reducing inflammation in your body: 

• Get plenty of sleep: Sleep is essential for reducing stress levels which helps to reduce inflammation in the body. Aim for 7-8 hours per night. This is easier said than done - but creating a bedtime routine is essential for this!  See this video for some tips on sleep!  Sleep Better!

• Eat an anti-inflammatory diet: Eating foods that are rich in antioxidants such as fruits, vegetables and nuts can help reduce inflammation levels in the body. Avoid processed foods, animal products, and sugar since they increase inflammation levels. 

• Exercise regularly: Regular physical activity helps boost circulation throughout your body which helps reduce inflammation levels by flushing out toxins from your system. Aim for 30 minutes of exercise at least 5 days a week if possible.                                     

                                         

 • Take supplements: Certain supplements have been shown to help reduce inflammation such as omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil), turmeric, ginger and probiotics. Talk with a holistic healthcare professional about which supplements may be right for you based on your individual needs. These are what I use with great results!  

 • Reduce stress:  Lowering cortisol levels in the body reduces inflammation.  Stress causes elevated cortisol for extended periods of time.  While we need cortisol, levels should not be high all day every day.  Essential oils like Lavender, Stress Away, RutaVaLa, Peace & Calming, and Chamomile have a calming effect, and can also help relax so you can sleep better.  Also, this is amazing at lowering cortisol levels.  

Inflammation can be beneficial when managed properly but it can also be damaging if left unchecked for too long. Fortunately there are many different ways to manage inflammation holistically without having to resort to medications or other treatments with potentially harmful side effects. By following these simple tips you should be able to easily manage any flare ups of inflammation quickly and effectively so you can live a healthier life!

If you desire to reduce inflammation, send me a message, and I will help support you on your journey!

The holidays are a wonderful time for family, friends, and fun. But they can also be a time of stress, anxiety, and even grief. If you're feeling anything other than happiness this holiday season, you're not alone. Here's a look at some of the most common emotions people feel during the holidays that bring them down—and how to deal with them.  I have felt each one of these at different times and know how much they can affect your life.  

Anxiety is one of the most common emotions people feel during the holidays. There are a lot of things that can contribute to holiday anxiety: financial stress, family dynamics, unrealistic expectations, and more. If you're feeling anxious this holiday season, there are a few things you can do to ease your mind. 

First, try to set realistic expectations for yourself and your loved ones and communicate your expectations. The holidays don't have to be perfect—in fact, they rarely are. Instead of putting pressure on yourself to create an Instagram-worthy Christmas or host the perfect Thanksgiving dinner, focus on enjoying quality time with your loved ones. 

Second, make a budget and stick to it. This will help you avoid overspending and going into debt—which can add to your anxiety. Make sure you are on the same page with your spouse by communicating and making a plan.

Third, take some time for yourself. Whether it's taking a long walk in the park, getting a massage with essential oils, or simply taking a few minutes to meditate each day, find ways to relax and de-stress. This can be hard when there is so much to be done, but even a few minutes to breathe deeply can make a difference.

The holidays can be especially tough if you've experienced a loss recently. Whether it's the death of a loved one, the end of a relationship, or something else entirely, grief can put a damper on even the happiest of holidays.  If you're grieving this holiday season, allow yourself to feel all the feels—sadness, anger, loneliness, etc. It's okay not to be okay during the holidays. Loss leaves a hole that cannot be filled.

First, reach out to your support system—whether that's family members, close friends, or a therapist—for help getting through this tough time. And if you need some extra support, there are plenty of grief support groups available both in person and online. Just having someone to express your feelings to can make all the difference. If your grief leads you down too far and you are in need of emergency help, 988 is the new 3 digit National Suicide & Crisis hotline.  You can also use the number: 1-800-273-8225.  

Second, do things that bring up good memories of your lost loved one, or something that will honor their memory.  This can be donating to their favorite charity, making their favorite cookies, or setting out one of their cherished decorations.  Remember the good times.  

Third, think of ways you can bring happiness to others.  Many times, when we step out of our troubles and focus on serving others,  it helps lessen the emotional burden.  We can be a blessing to others who are going through tough times, too.  Call a friend you haven't talked to in a while, take food or supplies to the homeless, or visit your lonely elderly neighbor.  

Like anxiety, stress is common during the holidays. There are many things that can contribute to holiday stress: cooking large meals, hosting out-of-town guests, traveling long distances, attending festive parties—the list goes on and on! If you're feeling stressed this holiday season, there are several things you can do to ease your mind. 

First and foremost: don't try to do it all! Delegate tasks whenever possible so you're not carrying the entire load yourself. 

Reach out for help when you need it! Don't be afraid to ask your family members or friends for assistance with cooking dinner or wrapping presents—they'll likely be happy to help! 

Second. make time for self-care! Whether it's taking a relaxing bath with essential oils before bedtime or squeezing in a workout at the gym (even if it's just 20 minutes), find ways to take care of yourself both physically and mentally. 

Third, remember the reason for the holidays!  Remember that Thanksgiving is all about gratitude and find things daily that you are thankful for.  Remember that Christmas celebrates the birth of our Savior and that He came to save us all.  He came to save YOU because He loves you!  

No matter what emotions you are feeling this holiday season—anxiety, grief, stress—know that you're not alone. There are plenty of people who are feeling exactly what you're feeling—and there are plenty of resources available to help you get through it. From setting realistic expectations to making time for self-care, there are lots of things you can do to ease your mind and enjoy the holiday season despite whatever challenges come your way.

Reach out.  As someone who has acutely felt each of these emotions during the holidays, I know how you feel.  If you'd like to join a supportive group of women learning and working on creating healing homes, and holistic lifestyles, visit us at Holistic Super Moms FaceBook page.  

Can smells trigger trauma?

The short answer: yes.

Can you do something about it?  Yes, again.  

It’s taken me a bit to process what happened a few nights ago.  We were all in bed and it was nearing midnight.  Suddenly my husband and I smelled burning plastic.  We were immediately out of bed searching the house.  Appliances, outlets, the garage, the attic, each room.  We pinpointed the smell in our teenagers’ room and when we turned on the light, it was smoky.  Although I appeared calm on the outside, I was fighting panic and had to grab my Peace & Calming essential oil while I prayed for safety and to find the problem.  We checked everything we thought it could be - the fan/light, anything plugged into an outlet.  I was having flashbacks from my youth that were extremely emotional, but kept my focus on finding the issue. There were no flames.  

With the girls groggily awake, one pointed to the mini camera sitting on the rug next to the outlet (not plugged in).  Sure enough, it was hot, self combusting, and melting into the rug.  We removed it from the house quickly, but there was no way the girls could sleep in there, so we sent them downstairs to sleep.  The smell was so strong, and we were wide awake, on high alert, wanting to make sure we got the true cause.  We kept checking for awhile as we got fans going, blowing the smoke out the window

 Upon returning to our bedroom and feeling like we could finally sleep, my guard went down, and the tears flooded out.  My husband comforted me and I cried out to God for peace and the ability to sleep (and added more Peace & Calming). You see, when I was in high school, my house burned.  We lost pretty much everything, and it was extremely traumatic for our whole family.  I remember it so vividly.  And that smell - that burnt house smell is one I will never forget.  Through an amazing church and community, the Lord blessed our family and we saw many miracles as we worked to rebuild our lives that would never be the same.  As the years passed, I thought I was past the trauma simply because I didn't think of it often.    

Then a few years ago, my sister’s house burned.  That brought up emotions I hadn’t felt in a long time, as I cried for her loss and tried to give what little support I could from far away.  When I went to visit and she took me through her burnt shell of a home, the smell triggered my past trauma, and I felt like melting into a puddle of weeping tears as I was transported back in time seeing flashes of my burnt teenage home - but I couldn’t break down there - it wasn’t my house, and there she was living a nightmare for a second time, this time as a mom, with repeat trauma herself that was much worse than mine.  I consciously stuffed my feelings.  But these kinds of things seem to keep coming back so that we can deal with them.

So this time, as I am still reeling from panic and anxiety, I’ve decided to take the time to process and deal with the trauma triggered by the smell and situation of the other night.  Prayer is always my first go-to, as God is mindful of all of His children.  And combining prayer with essential oils is powerful.  The thing is - I already know how to release trauma and heal emotions as I teach classes on emotional healing with essential oils - but I have not ventured near this specific trauma myself - it was buried deep.  So with this incident as a reminder that I still need healing, I am now open to letting it go through techniques I have used with success in the past for both myself and others.  I am ready to heal. 

Do you have emotions or trauma you have buried deep that you are in need of healing?   Have you been triggered by smells?  

You are not alone.  The sense of smell is the most powerful sense we have and the only one that goes directly to the seat of emotion and memory in our brains.  If you smell baking bread and it takes you back in time to your grandmother's kitchen, that pleasant memory is one of the ways the sense of smell works.  We can see and feel where we were when we smelled that scent, especially if strong emotions were felt at the time.  With trauma, it is not so pleasant. In fact, it can be debilitating for many, who struggle to heal.  

There is hope.  I will share more on overcoming trauma through smell in Part 2.