Not long ago, I experienced emotional pain that was so great I had a really hard time dealing with it. My younger brother died suddenly in an accident.
For those who have experienced a sudden loss in their lives, you may remember the actual physical pain that engulfed specific parts of your body. At that time it was my heart that hurt the worst. It physically hurt - like I thought I was having a heart attack.
I had never experienced emotional pain of this magnitude before. I felt as though there were cement blocks attached to my feet and a cloud of fog over my brain as I experienced the initial emotions of shock, disbelief, anger, and grief in those first weeks. And I hurt both physically and emotionally. Look below for the recipe I used to help with the emotional pain I was feeling.
Even now, as I write this, I feel tightness and pain in my chest. It is still pretty raw.
So, why does emotional pain physically hurt? Did you know that both physical pain and emotional pain activate the same areas in the brain? The anterior insula and the anterior cingulate cortex, to be specific (parts of the limbic region).
Pain felt from emotions is just as real as pain felt from bodily injury. It can also be located in a specific area of the body. We all know that when we are sad, we move slower, our bodies just don’t have the same energy that they have when we are feeling excited, our legs and arms drag.
We all feel strong emotions - both positive and negative - hundreds of times in our life and we feel those emotions in different areas of our body. All emotions are a part of life’s experience and there is no good or bad in feeling emotion.
Take a moment and think of a strong emotion you felt recently and pay attention to where in your body you feel it. Most people feel specific emotions in the same general areas of the body.
When we feel emotion, we have a choice to either express it or hold it in. We can express it positively or negatively. Or we can hold it and channel it for good, or stuff it which blocks energy and causes chronic pain. Sometimes the emotion itself is so great, it causes immediate pain.
In the example of grief, crying or weeping is actually a positive expression. It is actually good to cry. Emotional tears release stress hormones such as adenocorticotropic hormone and prolactin, also painkiller leucine enkephalin, as well as manganese. Releasing these from your body leaves you feeling better.
Getting support and love from family and friends helps us feel safe to express our emotions and helps us release them in a positive way. I am so grateful for those who were supportive when I needed them. Prayer helps us express to God those things that we don’t feel comfortable expressing to others. His unconditional love is such a comfort.
I have also found relief through this Emotional Pain Blend of pure essential oils. We know that essential oils have a great effect on the emotional parts of the brain (limbic region). I used this recipe quite a lot for a few months.
I mixed up a big bottle with the ratios below and applied it to my forehead and neck and rubbed it between my hands to inhale. This helped me calm down when I couldn’t do it on my own. It also helped reduce the physical pain I was feeling because of the emotional pain.
Emotional Pain Blend:
10 drops Idaho Blue Spruce
5 drops Idaho Grand Fir
5 drops Sacred Frankincense
Add dilution 50:50
To those suffering emotional pain, I feel you. I know how much it hurts. Turn to God, turn to your family and friends. It’s not only ok, it’s beneficial to cry and release the emotions through tears. I hope and pray you find relief as you go through the hard times in life that we all have. May God bless you with comfort.
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Recently, I have felt really down as the months of involuntary isolation from the world have dragged on. At first, I took a break, worked on projects, had some fun hanging out with my kids. But as the weeks rolled on, not being with the other friends and family I normally see on a daily basis started to emotionally take a toll on me. I have greatly missed serving in the children's ministry each week at church, volunteering at my children's school, participating in my fitness classes, teaching my wellness classes, and so much more. The stress of distance learning with 6 kids in school has been enormous - don't get me started on that! I have continued to do some of things at home that I enjoy like gardening, and have taken up sourdough bread making, but there are many things I have not been able to do. I miss my friends, I miss being around people! I know I am not the only one feeling this way. Many are feeling the strain from this whole situation.
I've felt down before, so I pulled from my resources 12 different ways I know how to lift myself emotionally. I already do some of these, and have once again implemented those that I have not been doing. I hope they can be of use to you.
- Gratitude journal. Take a few minutes each day to write down gratitude for things in your life that are positive. Look for the good, and open your eyes to see the silver lining in every situation. This is something that has really helped me.
- Prayer and meditation. I love to start and end my day with these. Ground yourself with God and the earth and get quiet. Ask for help when you need it, express gratitude verbally, ponder on positive actions you can take.
- Reframe negative events. Step back and look at the big picture, put your thoughts into perspective. The present situation will not last forever, there will be better days ahead.
- Create positive experiences. Find ways to spread light and love to others. Be compassionate and kind. It warms my heart how many examples of this I have seen these last few months.
- Keep good posture. Standing, even sitting in good posture helps our bodies feel good.
- Smile for at least 20 seconds in the mirror. Find a way to laugh at least 5-10 minutes per day. The release of endorphins, dopamine, and serotonin is a sure way to lift your mood and it feels so good!
- Exercise at least 30 minutes per day. Exercise releases norepinephrine, endorphins, dopamine, and serotonin, improving both general health and mood, and it's fun, too! Since my preferred place of exercise was closed, and I had so much to do at home with my kids and their school, I let this one slip for awhile - but I am back on track and can already feel the positive benefits again!
- Do service with a group. Finding unity through service is even possible from a distance.
- Listen to positive music. Put something on that makes you want to dance. This lifts my mood immediately!
- Give yourself 3 step goals. Set goals that involve simple steps, then work to achieve them. A sense of accomplishment goes a long way to feeling good about yourself and lifting your mood.
- Positive affirmations. Repeat these throughout the day to keep yourself in a positive mindset.
- Essential oils - Lemon, Lime, Grapefruit, Orange, Citrus Fresh, Joy, Cypress, Grand Fir, Frankincense, and Peppermint are good mood lifters. Clary Sage, Eucalyptus, Frankincense, Geranium, Jasmine, Juniper, Lavender, Roman Chamomile, Ylang ylang, Peace & Calming, Stress Away, and Valor are calming oils. Diffuse, or apply topically. As you inhale, the aroma passes through your olfactory system into the limbic region of the brain which controls memory and emotion. These can have immediate effect and are my first go-to for a quick calm down or pick-me-up. Find these here.
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I have been performing my violin since I was 6 years old but I have only had stage fright since I became an adult. I usually feel fine until I'm on stage and then I start sweating and shaking with anxiety. I always wonder if people can see my knees knocking together. I know my tone suffers when my hands shake because my bow shakes, too. I am so happy now that I have found a few things that actually help me settle down! I feel so much more calm when I use these things along with deep breathing.
My favorite oils for nervous jitters before a musical performance or public speaking:
Here's a video of me at the Beauty School talent show hosted at the Young Living Highland Flats farm in Idaho just for fun!
Essential oils are the best thing I have found to help with emotions. I apply them liberally a half hour before, and then again right before my performance time. I breathe them all. I also like to put Frankincense on my head, Valor on the back of my neck, Stress Away on my wrists, and Peace & Calming on my heart.
We have several classes on emotional health this month (including one with a special guest speaker tomorrow), check them out here.
My blogs contain some affiliate links.
Any purchase made is a blessing to my family at no extra cost to you!
Thank you for supporting us!
